The Innermost Dance

Deep down, it is likely that the world truly is perfect, but to the mind’s dualistic eyes, it is far from it. Two Decembers ago, I chanced upon an incredible inner movement in an empty beach called Kalipay, and suddenly, the world was somewhat perfect.
It was a dry mid-morning succeeding three sleepless nights and I was trying my best to seduce golden slumber. It happened so suddenly: a voice spoke clearly into my right ear – “the Mother and I are now One.” In a quick instant, I was a human puppet and the strings were dragging me from the first floor hammock to the second floor of our Robinson Crusoe-inspired beach house. Without my conscious say-so, I was laying on the mat and my throat began to make guttural noises, finally settling into a primal yet rhythmically enchanting melody.
It was very loud and sometimes barely audible, high-pitched then very low. The voice again whispered, “it began in Africa.” After about 15 minutes of these chanting sounds – simultaneously, my hands ended up automatically making percussive movements on my lap, chest, hips, and the bamboo floor slats – my upper body swung upwards and I found myself facing the leaves of the bamboo shoots directly bent over my Flower of Life vegetable garden.
Instantly, everything around me was still – the leaves abruptly stopped moving, as did the wind, the waves when an unearthly silence pervaded the surroundings. I couldn’t move a nano-inch of my body. From somewhere I don’t remember, the slightest vibration came upon me and a very high-pitched sound was coming from my throat.
The vibration intensified, spreading across my whole body until I noticed that my bladder was bursting full. When I directed my consciousness to the sudden pain in my abdomen, my body automatically jumped from the second floor balcony to the first floor then rushed to the beach in one swift motion. When I urinated on the sand, an incredible lightness came upon me. I am going to describe what happened next, but it won’t come close to giving you the clear picture.
I wasn’t possessed by some external force. That much is crystal clear. This isn’t the first time this happened to me. A year before this, I fasted on a “tree bed” I made in central Palawan for a week-and-a-half, and for the duration, my hands kept twirling over my seven energy centers as if directed by an inner force I knew was coming from within.
I picked up a wonderful Chinese term from a literature by Bruce Lee. It is “Wu-Wei,” which translates literally as “the spirit action.” I think I would like to use it to explain the phenomenon when the body moves precisely as the spirit moves.
For something that felt like two hours (it could have been more like a long thirty minutes), I was moved to dance in a way I didn’t think was humanly possible. I felt powerful surges of electricity being charged into me, and I was trying to contain it, but the only way I could keep from exploding – and I literally thought then that I would combust – was to keep screaming. I cannot describe the actual movement in words. I was doing somersaults, something I cannot do, as I twirled this stick that lay on the sand. And I found an intricate and powerful stick-fighting technique, which I was stunned to find I had unknowingly mastered.
Do you remember the scene in the movie, the Matrix, when Neo was downloaded programs for Kung Fu, Ju-Jitsu, Aikido, Judo, Wushu, and these other martial arts? It was precisely like that, up to the point that the back of my head grew really hot and was vibrating, at the same spot where Neo’s head had this big hole in it.
I remember praying in thankfulness for experiencing an inner gracefulness beyond belief, accompanied by a most blissful oneness. And when it was over, the perfect moment collapsed into this dead-tired 29-year old man spread-eagled on the beach, staring at a clear blue sky that was as empty as his conscious mind.
Kalipay Mountain
After that morning, the moment was as real as Mr. Sufflefegus, the Sasquatch and the White Rabbit from Wonderland. Try as I might, I couldn’t find the same movement. I really wanted it badly. Here was the promise of bliss without external agency, ecstasy without the pill, spirituality without the mind-numbing rituals. I figured that if I could access such a state of awareness, and find a way to maintain it in the ordinary moments, my life would truly change.
I wasn’t looking for shortcuts to human evolution. Deep down, I knew that this is an affirmation that enlightenment is not just a spiritual affair – we can cleanse the mind and body to achieve constant Wu-Wei. I was convinced that this could be shared with others.
Look. Something is missing in this world . . . something very essential is lost upon us. We have been looking for it in material things, educational attainment, and power-driven relationships, and whenever we think we are on the brink of catching up to it, we find that we are just attempting to grasp incense smoke that effortlessly slips through our fingers.
That first dance was the one moment when I did not have a doubt that absolute completeness was real, and that it can be attained. For a moment, nothing was missing in the world.
The experience was a large arrow pointing to a reality on Earth that’s as it is in heaven. In my case, the arrow was pointing at the peak of Kalipay mountain.
It took me two months to find the shaky determination to make my way upriver the spot where I would live for God/dess knows how long. A particular Cashew tree stood out. It stood firmly on the river’s path, near the peak of the mountain. I unknotted the live vines that spiraled around the thick trunk and used them to tie two large branches together to create a make-shift tree bed. It was my home for thirty-six days, my retreat space while I fasted on air, light, and a little bit of creek water.
The inner dance would come and go on a daily basis; it demonstrated to me how to “eat sunlight,” how to breathe properly, and how to perform some unfamiliar yoga positions while I was made to massage my legs, arms, head, and torso.
Again, my fingers kept twirling around my charkas, and I observed a checkered black and white circular TV screen on my forehead even when my eyes were open. It spirals into a vortex of changing colors depending on where my fingers danced.
Birds of all colors (even owls and fruit bats), monkeys, a wild boar, a very territorial bright-orange wildcat, ants, mosquitoes, my pet dog Bilbo and my cat Ming-Ming kept me company throughout those lonely cocooning days.
For the sake of spatial economy, I’m not telling you what occurred on that Tree of Life near the peak of the mountain overlooking North Palawan’s deep-blue. You probably wouldn’t believe half of it, anyway.
Dance of the Inner People
Prompted by some of the first Manileneos who were able to access the same energy I found in Kalipay, I’m writing these in Superferry 5 from Cotabato to Manila. They asked me to offer my 10-cent clarity on the information now being disseminated through national media, workshop gatherings, and other means by which the Inner Dance seems to have caught the attention of some people across the Philippines.
Ready? Let’s begin.
For a long time, our people have been searching for an innerwork process that works. A way of connecting with our Creator, where sitting meditation and memorizing prayers seem to fall short of. Now, if you read some of the blogs some brave pilgrims have published in www.innerdance.multiply.com, you will notice that the process works on several dimensions.
First, it is a way of quieting the hyper-mental space of even the busiest workaholic. Second, it has miraculously healed some difficult ailments which modern medicine could not. Two such publicized cases were featured on separate TV programs; the first case was of a large cyst that popped from the wrist of a participant a few minutes after he did the movements. The second case was a woman’s acute Glaucoma, which disappeared entirely after a cathartic experience of rolling on the floor.
Now, the third human dimension is of the most importance. The Inner Dance can clear a pathway to a higher state of energy awareness, not in a conceptual way, but through a very real and often transformative experience in mind and body; in a way that is difficult to doubt, especially once you notice your appendages moving without your conscious volition.
The Outer Cause or The Inner Effect
The word “dance” can possibly confuse people to thinking that the Inner Dance is a discipline. It is not a discipline. A discipline is something that can be studied and practiced regularly by a disciplined person. A discipline is an active cause that leads to a desired effect. I can understand how people who experience happiness, oneness, or bliss during and after the Inner Dance might think that it is the act of dancing that is the direct cause of their experience.
The Inner Dance is not a cause. It is an effect. Think of a cosmic mirror that reflects whatever kind of energy is within you. Some people find it difficult to access the movements because they cannot access happiness, oneness and bliss from within. They are those who are attached to illusion and often perceive themselves to be separate from some other part of existence they are resisting.
Then, some might ask, but why is it that people who do not seem so happy can easily access the inner dance, often even intensely? To answer this, I need you to look back to the moments in Kalipay that led up to the dance. For more than a year, I was eating mostly coconuts and bananas, while I was almost totally alienated from other human beings.
There is the temporal happiness in finding energy in a beautiful block of dark Belgian chocolate and by being consistently surrounded by people. There is a more persistent happiness, a kind that doesn’t get flushed into the toilet so easily. A kind of happiness that can be accessed only when one is purged of the illusion of separation, purged of need, purged of death. Those who are accessing the Innermost Dance have let go of external attachments to a great extent, and thus have found that the true source of life is within our higher self, or if you dare, our highest selves.
The Inner, The Dance, and the Inner Dance
You will meet some people who are doing some kind of dance – as a discipline, a form of exercise, to release tension, to have fun, or to perform in public.
You will meet a few who are doing some kind of Inner. They are those who are going inwards, away from outward fear-based norms in search of a higher, often hidden personal truth.
Or you might find the rare few who are doing the Innermost Dance. At its simplest, THE INNER DANCE IS A WAY OF TRANSFORMING DARKNESS INTO LIGHT. Darkness that is within us, and thus, outside of us too.
Not everyone is capable of accessing, and thus, sharing the Innermost Dance. Beware of would-be teachers who present themselves as Innermost Dancers loudly. There’s no sense in any spirituality that’s propagated through noise. Spirituality and silence are the auricles and ventricles of the same heart.
There are but two gatekeepers that can clear the way. Before you decide to receive or share this gift, you must first check your inner if your intention is pure. The second is simply to have an intense conviction that your individual and our collective evolution is not just possible, but is happening under our very noses, right here, right now.
The Inner Philippines
With these in mind, we might actually realize the newfangled dream of becoming a nation of healers.
We have certainly been purging ourselves for a very long time. Can you think of a better country where such nurturing energy could, should land?
Invert reality as you know it and see what happens. The most fertile soil in the Earth is being used to grow live food to be exported to foreign lands while we stay dependent on dead, starchy, fatty food scorched of the live enzymes responsible for purifying and evolving the human body towards perfection.
The world’s most nurturing nurses and caregivers are being sent to heal the rest of the world while we rely on chemical medicine and skeptical doctors that treat us as if we were machines instead of energetic beings capable of self-healing.
If the Inner Filipino found a way to govern himself holistically, would we still be wading through the same political mud?
What if Inner Philippines subsisted on simple food, simple energy that tolerates none of his complex addictions to material goods? What might happen to our economy if we discovered true wealth?
I’ll tell you. We would become the richest nation of Earth.
And when the Inner Filipina finally finds herself at the center of the Heart of the Earth, she will find herself staring at her country’s ancient name: MA-I. Through the cosmic mirror, MA-I reversed is I AM. Reverse our beliefs and we can maybe fathom what a country of individual I AM’s make out. A nation can realize itself if its people realized themselves.
Am I making sense to you, or am I the one who has everything in reverse?
The Indigenous People (IP) of the Philippine Islands (PI) used to believe that our country is the Land of Promise. Promises don’t just Land. Promises have to be fulfilled.
Do you have enough energy for all this? Try dancing your Inner, deep enough to where our Innermost selves are, where the world is truly perfect. Sept., 2007Continued, The Dancer Can Heal . . .

Stories

  When I came down from my 36-day fast in the mountain, a man named Ziga Nabernik arrived from Slovenia.  He was looking for The Beach, that mythical place in the Alex Garland Book.  I, too, once believed that it existed somewhere in the world, until I lived in the outer Beach long enough to figure out that the quintessential Beach of Eden exists within us all.The first time I gave him a healing session, his head burst into colors.  He said, “what was that? That was not a massage like you said it would.”  Another time, he regressed back to Rome.  He wasn’t watching the experience like it was in a movie.  He was really in a past life, being betrayed by his tribesmen, eventually dying at the hands of those “hideous Romans.”  When I left the beach for a week, I came back and he told me that he stepped on a poisonous insect.  After which, he lay on the tree house and before he knew it, his hands started to dance automatically and heal his injured foot. Later, the swell was gone.  The next day, the same thing happened, only this time, his hands did an intense massage dance around his head.Then another guy arrived named Tony, a doctor from Coron Island in Palawan.  He arrived depressed and tired.  When I first gave him a massage, his right arm just lifted into the sky and started to dance.  He obviously didn’t know what was supposed to happen.  In a sense, nor did I.  This was the first time anyone I massaged danced the way I automatically did.  Before long, his whole body was shaking, dancing, releasing so much energy that eventually, he was running the stretch of Kalipay beach, back and forth.  His experience lasted three weeks.  I saw him weeks after he left the beach and told me that he was able to apply the inner healing massage to some of his patients. Ziga too became a healer in his own right.  Fisher folk came to the beach and he would have them lie down as he took away their pains.That was affirming for me.  The visions I received in Kalipay was that whatever gift I was to receive from the Divine Mother is accessible naturally to the rest of the world.  Ziga’s and Dr. Tony’s experience was proof that the energy was not exclusive to me.  It was inclusive for all those willing to undergo the purgation process and had the heart to help others.There was a short stage when no one was dancing. My hands danced a very rapid kind of healing massage as I began to go from one fishing village to another. Then, people felt a surge of electricity entering their body but in turn, I felt drained.  In retrospect, almost everyone who came to me in those small communities in Palawan got healed. The energy had an effect on even difficult sicknesses such as Malaria and deafness.  Today, it isn’t the same.  Not everyone is healed, but the difference is that almost everyone dances.  The energy has evolved.  There is a prime lesson in differentiating partners who dance yet don’t get healed, and those who don’t dance but do get healed. One that I need not articulate, that you must find out for yourself.When I left Palawan right after my birthday (July, 2006), the manifestation of energy changed once more.  I felt the transition on the boat from Puerto Prinsesa to IloIlo en route to Davao City.  As I was lying on my cot, my hands began to vibrate.  I couldn’t stop it until I noticed people converged around a man at the far end of the room.  I approached the group and saw a guy convulsing.  I offered him a “reflexology” massage, and through slit eyes, he said he was willing.  When I touched him, his hand solidly raised to the air and I couldn’t move it with all my strength.  He looked like he was about to die.  Slowly, I lightly touched his wrists and felt a perceptible flow running through his arms.  Urging that flow to continue, I was able to make his arm dance slowly.  In those days, I didn’t have portable music yet.  I relied solely on the energy and I didn’t regard the healing yet as a dance.  I just saw them as particular movements that the body made when I touched them at certain points.  After a few minutes, the hands dropped and the man stopped convulsing.  He looked at me and asked me what happened.  He said he felt death closing in when suddenly, he was well.In Mindanao, the energy was the same.  Body parts of people would make certain poses and then freeze.  It was only when I felt that electric current and found a way to make it flow that the healing process would take effect.I was in Camiguin Island on Oct. 2006, when one of my good friends Ross who owns the treehouse resort I was staying in, asked me to facilitate a workshop for a large group of Koreans passing through on a peace camp journey.  I readily agreed with no idea as to what I was supposed to do.  I ended up discovering a group process that would make the Kalipay vision possible.  A group process wherein a large number of people can learn to heal and be healed in just a few minutes.  Suddenly, a whole town, a whole province, or even a whole country learning to heal was possible.  Or why not even a planet of healers?A few months after that, my mother gave me a 30G Ipod loaded with thousands of my brother’s music for Christmas; my brother gave me a portable speaker.  You can just imagine how my practice changed with the advent of music.It was when I moved to Manila that the vision became evident.  I met people who latched on to the work of bringing this into the world.  The first of which was Chato whom I met right after Kalimasada practice in the house of a friend.  She was instrumental in forming a strong foundation for a community that would later mother those who began to accept that the Inner Dance had the capacity to change them.  It was she who coined the term, the “Inner Dance,” pressured with what to text people to invite them to attend a healing retreat in Tagaytay, the first of many gatherings where people would discover this inner movement as I too rediscovered its many divergent forms I had forgotten since I left the Magic Island.Later, there were numerous people whose lives underwent some major changes as they began to accept their I AM’s as facilitators of healing that could bring flow to the world around them.  Troy Bernardo, for instance, has been travelling around Spain, and is fast becoming a popular healers with Brits, Italians and Spaniards there, even if those guys had been practicing healing before. He’s been experimenting with various kinds of rituals during gatherings. Justin Hakuta’s been attracting the Mayan connection in the strangest of places, New York City. Faced with the challenge of bringing energy to people in what he calls the “frenetic” big apple, he’s doing good giving healing sessions every weekend.  He developed his own unique and powerful method using breath that I really liked.There’s a guy named Joemar who arrived in one of the workshops late.  Before anyone had even touched him, he was in a trance, swaying around in a circle, until he fell off the chair.  For almost an hour, he danced a warrior dance I hadn’t seen anyone do except myself when I was alone in Palawan.  He is now travelling across some of the Philippines and much of Metro Manila healing almost any willing participant he meets on the street.  When he places his fingers across the windshield, the glass moistens with a clear trace of an energy line.There’s a guy in Cebu who underwent a two-hour catharsis.  In the middle of the session, he looked at me like he was about to kill me.  I went up to him, smiled, not knowing what was going to happen.  I tried sending light energies into his eyes, when he suddenly bounded around the room and changed his mood.  He became aware of the room, and after a time, forgot how to speak.  He became a child again, yet when you asked him the most profound questions you could think of, he could answer it by yes or no.  An hour later, he could do intensive Qi Gong movements without even knowing what it was called and could still recall it weeks after.  He had apparently accessed an ancient Chinese practice from that short session that both cleansed him and filled him up with energy. There are many more out there who’ve beautifully deepened and are now in the process of being led to wherever they find their higher selves hiding in.  Recently, I’m focused on the biodynamic farmers of North Cotabato, some indigo children I stumbled upon, and an occasional project or two with the UNDP in bringing inner energy to former combatants of the Moro National Liberation Front, both resulting in some very interesting sessions indeed. By now, it should be clear to you that the resonance is not coming just from coconuts, white sand and sea turtles.  It is a healing energy that has taken a life of its own, with a resonant power much affected by those bringing it to others.For those worried about this halo-halo resonant mix, the inner dance has a fail-safe insurance built into it.  It is sponsored by the energy of a patient mother spirit whose primary goal is to bring the flow back into the world.  I’ve seen people with the desire for manipulative power in their heads receive the inner movement and suddenly have their impure intentions bounce back instantly or over a long period of time. The Inner Dance has nothing to do with power or with trying to manipulate the outer.  The Inner Dance is only about Inner Strength.How to Live by your Self in a Deserted Island. There is nothing so intimate and crowded so as to live with just your self in the middle of nowhere, no matter how beautiful the surroundings.  Try it for a day and see if your weaknesses, your traumas and all your glitches don’t come bounding out of your inner woodwork.  They are necessary, though, for you to be able to look … to really look at yourself, discover that this is the me I’ve been hiding, the “I” that has brought me here.It took a few months for me to even just begin to really look at some of these parts that have been so instrumental to creating what I had become.  Many more months to admit that now is the time to transcend these life blockages in order to move on to my higher Ma-I.In Kalipay Beach, boredom and freedom are bedmates.  If I’m not doing whatever I want to be doing, I’m bored. The secret to conquering boredom is mastering the act of collapsing on the sand and just melting.  Just melting, being nothing, breathing in the fact that I have no meetings to attend, no classes I have to go to, no traffic I have to endure.  Until I start thinking how nice it would be waltz into coffee shop with a good book or to saunter into a film festival to watch an art film.  But then, I could just melt back into the white sand and think of how much pollution I would be breathing in, how much a cup of coffee in Starbucks costs, and I would be fine for half a day until I start craving again for distractions from the true work.  That and Chips Ahoy cookies.Which reminds me of a story you might appreciate.  A guy from IloIlo stumbled upon the beach one day in search of himself.  One night, he asked me a question: if I was stranded on a deserted beach and could wish for anything at all, what would it be?  I instantly offered, Chips Ahay Cookies!  As an afterthought, I mentioned to him how I would like to learn the ancient Chinese stick fighting technique called Wushu.  The very next day, nine people arrived on the way to another beach.  They decided to camp in Kalipay for a night because one of them knew the owner of the beach, an American named Carmen.And out of the nine people, there was one guy who brought some chocolate chip cookies. I don’t remember if they were Chips Ahoy!, I’m pretty sure they were.  But the astounding thing was that he was the 2^nd place winner in the Philippine National Wushu Championships the year before.  And for some reason, he kept insisting that he had to teach me a basic Wushu form, which ended up too complicated for me, but I retained enough of it nonetheless to mimic the form some bored mornings.The first time I climbed a coconut tree, despite how squat it was, my knees were making pounding noises against the trunk.  I was trembling that badly.  My fear of hunger eventually won over my fear of heights.  The next challenge was having to deal with an occasional gecko, snake, squirrel, fruit bat, or ant that co-habit the trees with yours truly.Opening a coconut without a bolo knife was a different matter altogether.  I know how Tom Hanks must have really felt.  I can now open a coconut in around ten ways.  The best part was learning how to pull myself through the branches to the topmost part of those tall swaying trees, just watching for passing birds or looking out for the two submerged sea turtles that lives only a few meters from the shore from that breath-taking viewpoint. Their heads would sometimes pop up like periscopes around mid-morning and late afternoons. On some nights, you might catch them laying their eggs on holes they dug, then burying them in sand. If you’re luckier still, you might catch the eggs hatching and watch the dozens of tiny turtles struggle to find the water.There was a man who sometimes visited me on the beach.  His name was Gener and he works in a French-owned beach house on the same island.  After more than a few months of solitude and coconuts, he once visited me with two bottles of wine, cheese, and cake.  After a glass or two, I couldn’t see my hands if I put them in front of my face.  Gener was accountable for plenty of good moments, talking about the Mayans, the Egyptian pyramids, UFO’s, the Knights Templars, and the Kalipay spirits.  He has eyes only for National Geographic and the Discovery Channel and thus, the only things he could update me on were such news.  I sometimes ask myself if I would have survived without those conversations with that man and his wonderful Londoner girlfriend, Kat. He’s somewhere in Europe now, probably missing the magic Island as much as I do.There was also a supposed caretaker named Itoy and because his wife was pregnant, they were always at the fishing village on the other side of the island.  There was a boat on the beach he was supposed to take care of which he never did.  And so, I was practically alone for weeks and months on end, seldom seeing another human being save for the fishermen passing by on their boats.And so, I learned to live with myself.  I learned that you can play scrabble alone.  I called it scrabble solitaire.  I also liked to gather the garbage that comes in with the tide.  I made installation art forms out of them, later creating a huge fence for my Flower of Life Garden.  What was best about the garbage is that most of it didn’t even come from the Philippines.  I was able to collect around ten different kinds of Procter and Gamble Shampoo bottles alone coming all the way from East Asia.  Most were from S.E.A. like Indonesia, Vietnam, Malaysia.  Gener even found a bottle with a Nazi sign underneath.  Who knows where that might have come from?  Garbage collection was good for a few months, until I got my hands on some matches from another visitor from America who stayed for around a week and a half.  The beach was always strewn with all these leaves.  I decided to pile them and burn them up.  There were so many leaves that I ended up piling more and more until I was just doing that the whole day, for three straight weeks.  As soon as I woke up (if I slept at all), I was piling leaves and burning them.  The next day was exactly the same.It wasn’t just leaves that were burning. Something inside me was getting seriously cleaned up.  I felt it.  It isn’t something I can describe in words.  It was tactile, like a resonant gap somewhere in me, where I knew there was something there before.  And that now, it was gone.I then felt that that this gap had to be replaced, or else it would fill itself up with the same old energy again.  That’s when I learned the art of dreaming.  And creating.  I found a way to re-create life every second of my wakeful days.  Every time a negative thought popped up, I would roll it into a ball and play with it until it was something else.  Something basic and good.  And when I did that enough, the change started happening.  I began to wake up … happy.  I started a daily morning regimen. Running, walking, until I was doing just that everyday, the whole day while I was awake.  Until I began to notice that I wasn’t sleepy anymore.  That I was just walking, sweating all day.  If I did sleep, it was two hours maximum.  And if I was eating, it was just one coconut a day.Such is the process of being cleansed.  Without tension of any kind physically or mentally, our need for physical sustenance and long sleep dwindles.Many of you doubt this.  There are many books out there that talk about people who have succeeded in transitioning to eating just fruits or raw vegetables. Many of those who subsist on live enzymes after many years, sleep only an hour or two a day, and eat very little.Inner Food.  Take the basic food groups and what nutritionists teach us we need to survive.  Fat, Protein, Carbohydrates, Sugar.Now, imagine a boring banana.Bananas don’t have fat, protein, carbohydrates or sugar.Now, imagine a needy hungry human.What if I told you that humans don’t need fat, protein, carbohydrates or sugar?When humans eat fat, their bodies undergo the rough digestive process of breaking down fat into simple fatty acids; protein into amino acids; carbohydrates into sugar; and sugar into glucose.Bananas have simple fatty acids, amino acids, and glucose.  Not to mention a host of other vitamins not present in most other food Thus, bananas already have all the basic essentials we need from food anyway, but, they don’t need to be broken down.  And if you free the enzymes you would have used to digest some of these food for hours and days – and instead use the same enzymes to metabolize, heal, cleanse and EVOLVE – what do you think would happen?  And if you just did that for years?  What would happen to your body?I lived in Kalipay for just a few years but when I left it, I had this naïve notion from my then inverse reality that everyone had probably transitioned to raw live enzyme food during my absence. Nothing else made sense. After I made the move back to the matrix, I suddenly felt so alone that I had nobody to eat with.  Eventually, I succumbed back to eating cooked food based on energy principles as I performed healing.  Nowadays, I spend half the month on total raw food and half the month eating anything people serve me, particularly when I go to Manila or Davao City for workshops and the like. It’s not because I’m tempted, there’s a resonance within what the people I deal with eat that I also need to take in, convert and assimilate.Inner Body. So, anyway, I was just living on coconuts when I went to the bathroom and noticed that my ______ was turning white.  I read somewhere that it is dying hemoglobin that turns our ________ brown or black.To add to that, though I hadn’t used shampoo in so long, my hair thinned and started to become silky.  As did my skin.  By now, after moving back to the civilization, my hair and my skin have returned to something similar to when I first moved to Kalipay, but I want to illustrate a point I’d rather not miss.  I used to be so dependent on products such as shampoo, soap, toothpaste, deodorant that I hadn’t realized just how useless these are when we are able to shift our complex and expensive needs to the most primal levels.  After many months of withdrawals, I never felt hungry, nor did I have body odor (although before I got to transition myself to this point, you wouldn’t want to have been anywhere near me).  This is what food does to us and the rough lifestyle of having to work for food how many hours a day, how many days a week, placing so much tension in our systems that we enter into a vicious cycle of having to work for what we need to maintain because we are working so hard in having to maintain them in the first place.As a working definition, spirituality does not have to dwell in the esoteric or the religious.  Spirituality can be this practical.  To live a life full of energy, simplicity and basic goodness.  To live a life that is light and free of weight.Alone on a deserted beach, there is no need to impress people; to base your actions on other people’s needs and expectations.  I would wake up and think to myself, “what should I do today?”  And every time, I would laugh loudly and lovingly utter the words, “whatever I want!”By the way, for my first year in Kalipay, I spent something like P756.00 in total.  That was mainly for writing materials. That averages to P63.00 per month or P2.10 per day for yellow ruled pad paper and some ballpens (and the tip for the boatman that took me to the mainland to get the stuff).Inner Planting. When I began to construct the Flower of Life Garden, I began to receive messages regarding myself, humanity, and particularly a very interesting planting system I used based on the 12/7 formula within the Flower of Life symbol.  I was able to gather some seeds from a faraway fishing village called Pulang Bato through the help of a fisherman who lived across the way, and basing it on the seven colors of the rainbow, I created a planting chart.  I was also instructed to create a sound resonating device using some old discarded bottles I found in the beach or that floated from the sea.  There seemed to be a connection between the seven tones in the musical scale and the seven colors.  Using the chakras and various parts of the body as a guide, I wrote down a chart that connected the seven days of the week with the twelve months of the year and twelve signs of the zodiac.  Some names of Greek gods and goddesses sprung up and I even used that over the roman zodiac signs.There was a moment after I finished planting the whole thing, when I just burned the chart I made, especially since I didn’t understand most of what I was doing.  Years later, I would be living with some biodynamic farmers who would tell me that Rudolf Steiner created a much similar calendar to what I created.  I haven’t found the gumption to burn any midnight oil over it, but the books are here in my space and it won’t be long until I take up the Key of Seven mysteries I had my mind set on as early on as my Mindanao walk.I also made a large compost using another resonant symbol called the Vesica Piscis.  It was divided into three compartments so that I could keep turning it in order to keep the aerobic and non-aerobic process ongoing.  This was the special moment I reserved each day when I would convert my frustrations into lighter matter, like the compost that later decayed into soil nutrients that plants could later use to ensure the growth of new plant life.The Secret Life of the Magic Island.  For years, even before I moved into it, Kalipay beach was known to be a mystical island where visitors dreamed vividly often of people in white, with long hair, white skin but who spoke Filipino and gave cryptic messages few understood. Many of these messages followed the theme of ascension.  I saw many of them in my dreams and in my waking state at night … along with many other creatures on the island that weren’t earthly.  Lights could also be seen floating around the trees, on the water or in the sky.  There were plenty of legends of sunken treasure, sightings of spirits and many visions.Knowing how the local fishermen knew about these legends, I would sometimes hide behind the trees during twilight and make strange noises to scare away the fishermen who boated to the waters across Kalipay, destroying the corals in front of the beach.  After a few of those hilarious games, the fishermen left the beach alone for most of the night time.The absentee caretaker eventually brought a cat to the beach.  When he and his wife eventually left the cat to fend for itself, I ended up with the dilemma of how to feed it.  When I got my hands on bananas from the fishing village, it wouldn’t take it.  But who would have thought that it liked coconuts?  That’s what it grew up on.  Coconuts, up until maybe half a year when it was big enough (not very big) to catch mice and lizards.  But even then, it still purred and mewed for me to climb a tree in the morning for food.  The cat was named Ming-Ming, which was what the caretaker named it.  All the while, I thought it was female, until I later learned that it was male.It was a strange cat.  At times, I felt a pain in my body during long fasts.  When I would wake up, the beach cat would be snoozing on that part of my body which wouldn’t be painful anymore.How To Walk Around Mindanao. Instantly, you would ask yourself, where would you sleep and what would you eat?One thing you have to understand is that I was in a big time trance during those days.  I had to pretend to people that I was normal, even if I felt that my feet weren’t on the ground most of the time.I slept where sleep took me.  On the road, in a forest, or in a bus station.  A lot of bus stations.  My solid rule was never to ask for money or food and wait to see where the journey would take me.  I later learned of an elderly lady who walked across the U.S. 28 times for almost thirty years (up to her 70’s!) without money or food in her pockets.  Her name was the peace pilgrim and she died the same day I was born.  I also learned that she began her journey at the same time of the year (beginning of January) at the same place (Pasadena, California) I first began to take everyday walks in preparation for the longer one I was to take.  Even in those days, I found myself in strange situations, looking for homeless people in Las Vegas, downtown San Francisco, or the slums of Los Angeles, talking to them all night about where they came from and how they ended up where they were then.  I sometimes slept with them in the cold just to see what it was like living the way they lived.Here is the only one secret I practiced to walking across Mindanao.  Put your left foot forward.  Shift your weight to your right as you step your right foot forward.  Repeat with your left.  Repeat with your right.  And so on.You just keep walking.  You don’t question your sanity.  You just keep walking, sweating, venting out negative energy.  I cannot count the moments when I would be sitting in a park and someone offers me food and drink.  How many times people ask me to stay at their place and spend time tutoring their children.  I confess I didn’t walk the entire length of Mindanao.  There are many places I still haven’t been to and there was a four month stay in Lanao and about a month in Camiguin and a few weeks in Davao when I stayed with kind souls, resting and walking in gardens and village streets at the latter part of the Mindanao quest.During the journey proper, people offered me clothes, ones I had to keep giving away because I cannot bear weight as I walked.  I survived on a small bag that fit two changes of shirts, an extra pair of shorts and a sarong (I began the whole thing on one pair of shorts, no shirt, and one pair of slippers).  In that blissful state I was in, even without money in my pockets, I always felt as if I was the richest person in the world.   

John of the Cross

  Juan de la Cruz. In Spanish, John of the Cross is Juan de la Cruz.  The moniker for the Filipino people.One of the reasons I chose to write this book is to answer a lot of questions that will arise once Epy Quizon’s movie The Dancer Within comes out.  It places me in a rather peculiar light. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nAArfDQAUi0)Who is John?  Which John is it?  Many references in the movie relate to John the beloved and John of the Cross, and the fact that I changed my name to Juan while I was living in Palawan. In my past writings, I used to mention John of Patmos and I’m often heard singing the only guitar song I know by John Lennon. Even the books I read have heroes in them named John.  It was not part of any elaborate plan. Just as Epy will attest to how things happened to him, things just ended up happening to me too.When I was on the island, I felt a resonance with one of Jesus’ disciples.  John the Beloved.  I was piqued at the ending of the Book of John, specifically the part about the existence of a disciple who would tarry on Earth until Jesus comes again.  The Book of John was my favorite book in the Bible. The spirits mentioned him occasionally, particularly when they were asking me to undergo the name change from Pi to Juan.So when I was starting to bring my healing work to Luzon, a kindly nun set me aside one night and spoke to me.  She told me that she felt compelled to tell me the story of a babaylan in the far North of Luzon who may have a connection with me.  The more that she told me about Kako, a spirit who descends upon a lady named Lita, I felt a curious vibration on my skin.  I listened with rapt attention, but I was also becoming weaker every minute.  The Good Shepherd nun who spoke to me, Sister Rosario, spoke of how she underwent a forty-day sickness before she met this Kako spirit. My curiosity was aroused because of the many similarities on the character of this spirit and the feminine spirit who was my guide, protector, and divine mother all these years.  She also briefly mentioned that Kako precedes a male counterpart named Kakay, who is supposedly the resonant spirit of John the disciple.The day after this conversation, I got sick.  For the next forty days, a feverish chill took over me for a few hours and I would experience a feeling of dying and rebirthing on a daily basis.  My brother had to check me into a hospital when he found me naked in the bathroom delirious, splashing myself with water. In the two hospitals I was checked into, no doctors could effectively diagnose what was wrong with me.  My temperature would jump from normal then all the way to a fatal 42 degrees in a matter of seconds, which would remain for a couple of hours until it returned to normal as rapidly as it rose.As soon as I was finally able to get away from the hospitals and the well-meaning doctors, I locked myself in a hermitage in Tagaytay City.  I knew what was happening.  I was being cleansed again, in a different way.  Each day, I had to expect the raging sickness, that daily death as I hid from the world, coming out of it feeling lighter than ever, only to fall unconscious again the day after.  Little by little, the sickness left.  And I felt different once more.  Not stronger, not weaker.  Different.The Spirit named Kako. A few weeks later, I felt the strange weakening again.  Suddenly, Sister Rosario called to inform me that Kako was is Manila and that I could meet her that evening.  Sister Rosario’s mother was injured and she called Lita to come to Manila in the hope that Kako would come and heal her mother.  Things began to make sense in my mind.  If Sister Rosario experienced the cleansing sickness right before she met Kako, I felt like I too was subject to the same healing process.I rushed to a house in Fairview with Chato, Bong and a Korean lady named Soni.  When we got there, Lita was waiting.  It took maybe a little over fifteen minutes when the affable Lita started to yawn and cough.  She bent over and when I saw her face again, she was transformed from a middle-aged woman into an elderly grandmother.  A person who lived in that house gave her a cigar and she began to speak in the old Ibanag dialect which had to be translated by her aide.  The first thing she told me was that I took much time in finding her.  That she had been waiting for me for a long time.  I was surprised.  My first words were supposed to be just the opposite: that I had been looking for her for a very long time.And thus, a long meeting took place.  She austounded me with the assertion that Sister Rosario’s mother had to have an accident so that she would be called to Manila and I could meet her (I was set to leave for Mindanao already). She told me that I must find a special place in Mindanao and that I was also being given a mission.  I had to go inside the caves to find the bones of the ancient healers of this land.  She affirmed certain things I wanted to know, and spoke of how the world forgot that it had the power to heal itself but that history made it forget.  She then gave me a date on when I should return (3 months later), and that something important would take place.  The date was Oct. 3.I got busy after that, concentrating on the work that I was given in Palawan – To give back to the world the dance that heals.  The only time I remembered Kako significantly was a moment in a river in the Mt. Apo foothills when I was seated upon a rock and felt that rock speaking to me.  It’s message was Resonance.  “Listen,” it said. “Everything is resonating.  Everything is alive.”  I looked around to make sure I wasn’t imagining things.  I looked again at this really big Rock I was on.  It continued to speak to me. “Rocks are made of energy.  Just as you are made of energy.  You must learn the lesson of resonance.  Look around you.  Everywhere there is light.  Even the dark places are light.  Light is information.  Information is everywhere.  Your bones aren’t just bones.  They are crystals.  They are made of light.  They seem like rocks but they are full of information.  Just like Rocks. Rocks are crystals.   And they have been here much much longer than man.  Thus, rocks are in a way wiser than men.  The lesson is Resonance.  Raise your vibrations through love.  Through the Inner Dance, raise your resonance that you may find connectedness even with the densest matter.  May they be rocks, or bones.”And the communication ended.  I was so illuminated that I was convinced that I didn’t have to spelunk inside any old cave.  That we ourselves, our human bodies are caves full of shadow and darkness.  But we are also crystals. And all we had to do was to ascend to our vibrant light bodies, by converting the shadows into resonant light.  It is our bones, our density that contains the information that can help us remember Who We Really Are, and how we might become them.The Journey to the North. So, despite my schedules, I left for Manila before October 3. Right before that, I facilitated an Inner Dance workshop in Baguio City.  The day after, Epy Quizon arrives with two of his crew to follow a lead on a mysterious Inner Dance session that happened in his house when Jaime Licauco was embraced by a warm spirit that led to a healing of his chest (he had undergone an angioplasty a month or two before).Epy ended up tagging along to my meeting with Kako despite his own busy schedule.  The rest was caught on tape.  How I resonated with something within me that spoke of things I don’t usually say, and hardly think about.  A connection with John was established when I was made to go back to Kako’s temple the next day to meet the spirit Kakay, who is supposed to be John the Beloved or John the Evangelist.  If you’re ultra sensitive, when you watch the film, you will see that I was in a kind of trance when Kakay came into the room.  My energy changed as the resonant Kako moved to another woman and Lita was becoming Kakay.  The camera didn’t catch it but I was at the back of the room having chills and feeling this unbelievable energy activate within me.  Before that, I was inside the van while Lisette was asking me to go out already.  My mind was resisting what was about to happen. When I went into the church, I was already in a half-trance.  By the time I was already dancing in front of Kakay/John, I was being directed by the energy.  It was a different energy than what it was the first time I danced in Palawan.  I was more conscious this time, more accepting that these two divergent energies I now feel are both me; it was if I was speaking to myself:  “flow through me as I flow through you.”Moving on … what I want to talk about is the sponsoring principles behind the event.  I’m going to assume that you either watched the film or can get access to it.The importance of the whole event can be summed up in the words Kako compelled me to say in front of the camera.  I am The Father and The Mother.How audacious that must be, eh?  Who did I think I was?  Who do I think I am?  Give me a minute.I am anything other than audacious.  Everything, I repeat, EVERYTHING, I repeat ……… EVERYTHING is an ILLUSION.  You can argue with me again and again about this, and it doesn’t matter, everything IS an illusion.  The flying Dutchman is an illusion, so is that Jollibee mascot, so are you and me.   So is John.  John is a symbol that resonates within the collective consciousness.  Everything that seems real is a resonance within the collective consciousness.Without my planning it, my life’s patterns ended up collapsing on a resonating symbol which is John.When I was in Palawan, I heard the voice, The Mother and I Are Now One.  That was a different resonating symbol.  When my body moved to the flow, I was manifesting the resonance I received in Kalipay.  The flow is the feminine principle. It is not rigid, nor is it unyielding as the male principle sometimes is. Having lived with flow alone for all that time, I became it.Now if you watch the film closely, notice how Kakay or the male principle descended upon Lita only after Kako was in the room; the spirit transferred to another medium in the room.There is an important lesson in this.  Listen.  I’m not making this up, this is how it happened and the meaning behind the events is what things boil down to.I’m not about to claim that I AM this John, or worse yet, Jesus his master.  If John is symbolic, or better yet, if Jesus is symbolic, if everything is illusion and the world is much much older than we think, John and Jesus is not in the clouds above us as some institutions would have us think.  All of creation resonates from within.  Within Us. This is a quantum principle that cannot be denied, not even by science.We all have in us the quantum resonance that is everything and everyone that was ever created, and will ever be created.  Infinity exists within us, Here and Now.  What makes me such an anomaly was my willing and insane nature to break out of the resonance that is the world, what popular culture now calls the matrix.  And so, this is the most logical explanation I can give you on what IS this Inner Dance.  It is a resonance of all the coconuts I’ve eaten, those two years of happiness, that long walk in Mindanao, that thirty-six day fast in the mountain, that meeting with the Mexican, and a host of a lot of other things you don’t know about.There is nothing esoteric about any of it.  If you think about it, all these can be understood by both the scientific and the spiritual mind.  From the angle of food, the coconut is known to have the highest measurement in frequency (300 hz.) compared to all other foods.  Try eating it (and only it) for two years and see if you don’t get any sort of resonance from it.  While everyone I used to know was living in a world that was resonating with mobile telecom frequencies, food preservatives, a lot of problems, corned beef, and such, I was communing with some eagles, some sea turtles, squirrels, a white sand beach with almost no human complex human companions. Not by way of putting myself in a pedestal, this is the best way I can both prevent people from jumping into conclusions after seeing the movie, as well as keeping true to the very reasons I’m on this Earth in the first place.Let’s go back to what happened in Cagayan.Listen. The world has embraced the symbolic Kakay (or the male) principle for so long that it has forgotten the balance, or the way things truly work.According to the Cagayan event, the feminine principle is supposed to come before the male principle.  The heart, spirit or essence of a thing must come before the mind, logic or form of a thing.  This is the secret, this is the primary message that is signified in the event.The message in Palawan was The Mother and I are now One.  The meaning of the message was that I had found in that island, surrounded by water, the feminine principle.  The flow.  The message in Mindanao was the opposite of just living in a beach doing absolutely nothing.  Instead, I lived a passionate life walking around with fire inside me.  It was a time for resonating with the male principle.The message in North Luzon is balance.  If the feminine principle, the water, the flow, the essence, the heart, or the spirit is in the room, then and only then should the male principle – the mental, logic, rigidity, fire, creative energy – descend.Having been a vehicle for the energy of the Divine Mother for the longest five years in my life, I’ve long before realized that the flow can only take you so far without mind.  The problem lies in our tendency to push away the heart of a thing for the sake of our mental rigidity alone.  Thus, our inability to flow, to let go of our trapped energies, our ability to heal ourselves as well as others.We are searching for a difficult balance.  A Mind That Flows.  Without purgation, the dark nights of the soul, today’s mind is attached to needs that make this flow difficult if at all possible, if we are going to found the land of promise we have been searching for a very, very long time.Thank you for listening.  I didn’t come here to save the world.  I’m just here on Earth to tell you that I can find my own joy and share that resonance for co-journeyers who are also looking for that same joy in their lives.  If I didn’t explain any of this after the movie comes out, I would be biting more than I can chew, I would be painting myself into a very weird and lonely corner indeed.Everyone is Doing What I Am Doing. Everybody’s resonating one thing, if not another.  When you enter a room in a bad mood, you are resonating that mood.  Which you may have resonated from someone else who was in a bad mood.  Someone who cooked your food or someone you passed on the street.  Or someone who wrote a book that you read or wrote a script in a movie you watched.  We are all full of this resonance.  From the time you were in fetus, you were resonating things your mother resonated to.  How much of this resonance got collected when you went to school.  How much have you gathered from all the time you’ve spent glued to the TV? How much pain have you suffered?  How much of that pain have you kept resonating within your day-to-day patterns?   Everybody’s resonating all of the time.The Inner Dance is a Resonator.  It is.  When you’re in that state of trance, you realize how futile it is to hide from your inner self, no matter how hard you try.  Your natural state bounds out of the box and you find your body moving in a way you didn’t command it to.  And do you know why you don’t stop, despite your loss of control of your body?  It’s because it feels right.  The Inner, expressed, feels too good.  Too natural.  When it is happening, you feel the healing process taking place, don’t you?____________________In the old days, one person in a community will have undergone a long period of sickness, fasting, a purgation process much like Kundalini Rising or The Dark Night of the Soul.  Usually female, that person becomes the community’s spiritual guide, and in cases of illness, the community’s healer. That person is called the Babaylan or the Baylan.  Often prone to dancing in trance, the person is seen as a medium for the spirit of the divine mother.  These prominent spiritual leaders are known to have passed a certain test (which the Indigenous Peoples of the Americas call a Vision Quest) in the deep forest, where they are made to survive in the wild in search of their higher calling.  The babaylans too were resonators. They are the few who choose to undergo the cleansing in order to give unconditional service to their people.  Lita herself underwent major bodily changes to be able to surrender her life to helping others unconditionally.A lot of those who’ve attended some of the more intensive inner dance gatherings will resonate with these ideas.  They are figuring out that society is not sated with depending on one person in a community responsible for self-cleansing and performing a healing ministry.  We are all called to resonate with our babaylans within.  The old ideas that a savior somewhere will save the world is slowly fading into a new thought, more profound. We are all realizing that one soul cannot carry the weight of another; but only by looking at one’s weight and finding a way to convert that darkness into light might any kind of salvation truly take place._________________I have a nice story about a recent workshop I gave in Manila for how to build Inner Dance communities or core groups.  I made people dance with rocks they randomly chose.  Suddenly, their bodies began to do very spontaneous things with the rocks as if it had an inner energy that drove them to do some of the things that they ended up automatically doing; things you do not normally do with rocks.  Later, I jumbled the same rocks in the center of the room and made people choose from the pile again.  Suddenly, everyone’s dances changed.  During the forum later, you can guess at what happened.  People eventually discovered that they resonated the dance of the former owner of the rocks they got the second time.  The stories and the movements matched in a way that it provided validity to the Inner Dance being a powerful resonator of one’s over-all inner and outer energy.  There are too many interesting stories to put into even a voluminous book.  Many of them, I’m leaving out until you demonstrate that you’re mind is open enough for some of the stranger inner manifestations of the Inner Dance.  For the meantime, here are a few I don’t mind telling.Continued, Stories . . .  

Alchemy

  There are infinite ways of converting darkness into light.  Why is it then that people do not find any of them?  One important standard for deciding which person is ready for the healing process is founded on the answer to this question.  People do not find any of the infinite ways to convert dense energy to light because they are not choosing light; they are still rooted in density.An understanding of the chakras should illuminate this point.  The Chakras are closely related to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs – which states that in the stages of a human’s development, a person ascends through a hierarchy of sources of energy ranging from biological, safety, belongingness, esteem, and self-actualization.Let me get back to the chakras again.  I would like to establish a few points before any of this starts to fit into place. As an energy worker, I am willing to speak out and generalize on certain specific ideas at the risk of ridicule and even ending up being wrong. My truths are my truths, coming from my experiences and my perspective. Only. Its validity ends where my awareness ends, and whether there’s value in any of these for you, is all up to you.I’ve worked with more than a thousand people after almost two years of going around the Philippines sharing the energy I found in Palawan.  Based on those experiences, I notice two kinds of people.The first of the two is highly receptive to the Inner Dance.  I’ve touched several people for just a few seconds on their crown before they stand up and start dancing as if they have been trained to do these intense yet comfortable movements professionally their whole lives, even if they never did them once.  Others react so well to it that seemingly impossible sicknesses are healed after a few minutes only.  Others almost instantaneously activate within themselves a sense of bliss that lasts for days and weeks on end.The second kind is just the opposite.  No matter how long I work with some people, nothing happens.  The longer I work on them, the more I get zapped to the point of wanting to just drop on the floor and just lay there.What is the difference between the first and the second?I’m not in a position to say that those receptive to the Inner Dance are better people than those who have a resistance to it.  What I am in a position for is to make observations from all my past healing sessions and be able to say what makes them different from each other, in regards to their backgrounds.This is going to be complex enough as it is. Let me go straight to the point.  The first category have a certain looseness about them.  A looseness as to the way they see life.  They are those who’ve undergone certain experiences that have led them to believe that there is more to reality than what they see with their human eyes, hear with their ears, smell, touch, taste and often think about.  They are people who are not as concerned about the outer, as compared to the inner.  I would like to call them The Inner People.The second category have a certain firmness about them.  In regards to how they see the world, they are rigid and unyielding as to their set beliefs.  For them, the world is static and they work hard at investing a great bulk of their energies to maintaining these truths.  They believe that truth is objective, is measurable and static based on truths that are defined by society.  For the sake of context, I will call them The Outer People.Not to be too mechanical about it, I’m pretty sold on the idea that we all have in us, an Outer and an Inner Life.  To varying degrees.  So let’s not put people in boxes too easily.Now, let’s go back to the chakras.  The lower chakras are denser than the subtle chakras located near the upper regions of our body.  Depending on our stages in life, our life experiences depend on what reality we believe in.  If a person’s reality is much chauffeured by his sexual drive, his reality might revolve around this part of the hierarchy of needs we might label the sex chakra.  If it is family that defines the person, her needs and satisfaction of needs might revolve around that part of the hierarchy that mostly corresponds to the solar plexus, the heart and the throat chakras.If a person is fine with where he or she is at in that hierarchy – if you ask them if there anything more to life than what you are experiencing now, and he or she says yes – then the Kundalini, the Sekhem, the Shakti energy will keep still in that precise level of reality the person defines him or herself on.I’ve been talking about blockages all this time.  I cannot think of a better way to explain why some people’s blocks are just too difficult to remove.  The level of Kundalini in which a person resides is determined by beliefs, which in turn is conditioned by the person’s loves and fears.  Sometimes, people revolve around certain life patterns because they habitually avoid certain fears or are attracted by certain loves.  These patterns often determine which level of reality people believe and consequently live in.Thus, blocks can also be seen as a resistance within a person to move to a different level of reality based on something they are afraid of or because of their addiction to something they believe they love.  If a person is “stuck,” it is because their desire to move to the next level in the hierarchy is far outweighed by their tendency to remain in the level they are in.The Inner Dance is really just a manifestation of change.  Those who are receptive of the energy provided by the Inner Dance often attest to certain bodily changes more commonly associated with the rising of the atrophied Kundalini energy or the shakti (feminine) energy from the base of the spine to the crown.  Here are just some of those inner and outer changes:Either a great feeling of hunger or just the opposite – some people lose their addictions to dense food and transition to lighter food intake such as vegetarianism, raw food, or fasting A short phase of physical cleansing or even sickness (healing crises).  Those who undergo this experience withdrawals of toxins both bodily and mental. A feeling of discontentedness as to various aspects of work, the levels of human relationships, etc. Climate changes within the body.  Slight fevers or chills. Opening of the pineal gland; seeing visions, having vivid dreams, feeling a new awareness of the world around A readjustment of levels of energy.  Bursts of energy are followed by stages of needing to rest Moody people also claim to find a sort of balance regards their swinging emotions. A tendency to become introspective at various times of the dayThese are just a few symptoms of both Kundalini rising and the Inner Dance.  Upon seeing this, the logical take would be to ask, “what’s the point of undergoing all those?”The Point. When I was living in Palawan, those symptoms were just a few that I experienced.  I moved to Kalipay beach at the age of 28.  For two years, my body was subject to all kinds of discomforts.  At times, I would lie in bed for weeks not moving, fasting for days on end.  Walking along the beach, I would just cry for no reason at all.  After a few months of living on mostly raw food, my skin would break out in rashes.  If you were to direct the question now hanging in the air to me, what would I say?  What was the whole point in going through all that?Before I set out on the journey that led me to this kind of work, I was a fairly negative person.  I was moody.  Many called me “masungit.”  My body was heavy, as heavy as the negativity I couldn’t shake off my head.  I had many bad habits and some addictions I’d rather not talk about. No matter how hard I tried to change my life, nothing seemed to work.  Without my two years of cleansing myself in Kalipay, and that one year walking around Mindanao, would I feel as light as I do now?  Would I be able to let go of the world’s distractions and devote my waking life to healing?Would I still be working as a marketing person six days a week to accumulate enough money that would pay for my rent, fast food, parking tickets, fossil fuel and tune ups for my car, clothes while I live in a polluted city whose noise levels won’t allow me the clarity of thought I’ve been searching for, the bulk of my adult life?It’s a complicated world, and nothing works like we think it does.  Like machines.  Like cause and effect.  Only God knows how I would be now if not for Kalipay, that Mexican stranger, that long walk, and so on and so forth.What I do know is that the road to a cleaner and better life is not always comfortable.  From my experience, healing isn’t always a happy-happy joy-joy thing.  True healing takes determination, courage, wisdom, and a lot of work (without always having to work).Let’s go back to Kundalini, the chakras and all that jazz. Without complicating things, the Inner Dance is a travelling of the “Who Am I” from density to light.  It is as simple as that. Without the same looseness that inner people have, outer people will have a hard time changing. The experience will be very much like a camel trying to pass through the eye of a needle.That said, what makes Inner People loose?The Dark Night.  St. John of the Cross said it best.  He coined the term, the Dark Night of the Soul.  It is that moment in time when you have regarded the great institutions of life – economics, politics, religion, education, even family – and realized that even though there is nothing wrong with any of these, there is a limitation consciousness that prevents us from finding in them alone, a state of unity.  It is when you have come to the profound realization that there is something essential missing in life that cannot be found in books, in romance, in TV shows, in burgers, in drugs, in a nice house, a fast car, an expensive vacation, or by memorizing prayers.The Dark Night is a long simultaneous process of doing two things.Letting Go of IllusionsAccepting a Greater TruthThose who are able to survive these Dark Nights are the ones who get tired of looking outwards for happiness, for satisfaction.  Instead, they look for truth (what some might even call God) from within the Self.  The Buddhists say it nicely too.  They often pronounce that “despair clears the way.” Continued, John of the Cross 

Special Ailments

  This section alone is an entire book, but if I did end up jotting down all my thoughts on specific parts of the body and the illnesses that strike them, I would also be guilty of jotting down an entire volume of bias and filtered practice.  I’ll speak of starting points and let you take off from there.People will approach you with various complaints, at times, simultaneous.  YOU DO NOT HAVE TO DIAGNOSE.  Don’t begin by asking people what’s wrong with them.  Then, you might end up working on the symptom rather than the source of the problem.In a lot of Western countries, I would be fast castrated for releasing these statements and ideas so far removed from what is and what is not accepted. Countries where you need rigorous mental training to heal others. Countries where real healing takes place in air-conditioned hospital rooms, where needles pump chemicals into people’s bloodstream ir order for them to get well.Do know that while it helps to be sensitive to a person’s condition, it pays well for me to keep hammering one thought that can help you navigate as to when to do this and when not to do this from another vantage point.  If you are going to enter into this with any insecurities, any doubts as to your ability, fears as to what might happen, then don’t, rather than pointing fingers later on.  I have not yet been accused of creating any kind of dissonance in a person’s life after undergoing so many sessions in my life. I am owing it to faith and a primal belief in what unconditional love can do.  Not all healing must cost thousands or millions of pesos facilitated by people who do it because they have to earn a living.  There are unexplored worlds out there we have yet to discover on how people can help each other find life, health and vigor not because it’s a job, but because it is a most beautiful way of relating to each other that will probably have the bigger chance of bringing back the NATURAL ORDER of things.Just be gentle.  The sponsoring energy is the mother.  There can be no more gentler sponsor than she.  Is than enough to allay your mental dissonance?  If not, leave it alone for now.  You cannot release the energy blockages of another if you even your basic mindset is this dissonant.Moving on. Let the dance be the arbitrator on who and what in them needs work.  If they agree to let them help you good.  Further, if they volunteer information, let it flow into you but by no means should you stick to it as the solitary focus of the session.  Do not collapse reality into what people think is real.  You cannot heal a person by believing in the sickness.  Instead, start off by believing in wellness, and that sickness is just a stumbling block that you are about to remove.Depending on the ailment, you can do the session in lying, sitting or standing positions.  If it’s an ailment where you need mobility or specific access to the back, for instance, back pain, or ailments involving the shoulders or the arms, start with the cross-legged position but with ample room in case the flow leads them to lie on their back.  If it’s caused generally by a lack (or imbalance) of energy such as fatigue, headache, mental disturbance, let them lie down.  The latter position applies to severe cases such as cancer, stroke, heart conditions.On purely psychological terms, many who will approach you with ailments are quite open to the possibility that they will leave the space healed.  You have to match the faith they place on you with your own conviction that you have the capacity to help them, truly – without letting it go to your head that you are their “healer.”  You are nothing but a placebo.  All doctors and medicines, all healers and their rituals are mere placebos.  Only the self can heal the self.Knowing you are placebo, you have two responsibilities.  You are in a position to heal people AND to invariably teach them that it was they who healed themselves.Begin each session by asking them to close their eyes and first letting them absorb the music.  Your goal is to take their attention away from normal limitation consciousness where their scattered focus is directed to their pain.  In such cases, I begin with music that triggers the delta brain wave frequency.  Currently, I’ve been using a sound healing rendition of a Mozart lullaby by Steven Halpern followed by The Healing Spirits by The Troikas.For sessions that begin with your partner lying down, your goal is to start the infusion of energy at zero point. Don’t even bring energy into the picture until their body is absolutely relaxed from head to toe.  Don’t talk them into relaxation such as in guided meditations; use only the music and a little bit of patience.  The better you are at this, the easier it will be to facilitate the process later.Start with the crown, both for the sitting and the lying down start-off points.  Simultaneously center yourself as you feel your partner’s energy ball gathering force.  Feel your partner.  Feel the floor.  Feel the room.  Feel the music.  Feel yourself.Then, from the energy surge you should feel coming into your heart, your brain and your spine, gently let your fingers and your wrist begin to dance as it massages your partner’s head. Pay attention to the temples and the crown primarily.  Don’t expect that your partner will instantly find the movements from the lying down position.If Your Partner is Lying Down. From this position, the healing is more passive.  The entry of earth energy from the ground and cosmic energy from above is horizontally scattered across the body.  It is important to begin with zero-point energy from this position.  When I say zero-point, I’m referring to the most relaxed mental (which defines the physical) state possible.  When you do this, you are attempting to lower the electro-magnetic pulse of your partner.  When mental activity is low, so is the body’s magnetic frequency. This is the optimal state in which electric resonance may be infused into your energy partner.First, raise the level of vibration of the crown chakra by activating it similarly to the instructions given earlier.  After around five minutes of concentrating on the crown and the temples, move your attention to the arms.Start with the energy gaps on the wrists.  If you do this well, the arm section from the elbow to the hands should have no problems finding the inner dance.  From zero-point, people’s experience of having those arms move without their conscious volition should be striking for those to experience this for the first time.  It is difficult to deny the inner dance when a person is lying down because of the way the body spontaneously moves against the flow of gravity.Once an arm finds the movement, leave it alone.  Let it just dance, before you bring your attention to the other arm.  The longer people do the movements, the easier it will be for them to bring the level up to the shoulders.  When you intuitively feel the moment come, activate the energy gap where the funny bone should be, then gently nudge it into the dance.  Your partner should feel a spontaneous rush that makes the entire arm region reach upwards in slow gentle rhythmic movements.If this doesn’t happen, then assume that there is a major energy block you have to work on.  Walk around your partner slowly. Don’t presuppose that you are going to consciously focus on where you think the block in the body might be.  Instead, bring your attention to your own body.  Find the dance.  Just find it.  Don’t do anything.  Just let the flow take you over.  Your hands will begin to make spiraling or circular movements that will slowly rest on a body part.  Whether your hands simply enervate, massage or dance in the vicinity of the body part, maintain that flow.  Did your hands go to the arms, the feet, legs, head, heart, abdomen?  Whatever the case, do what your body makes you do.  Give it whatever time it needs.  You will know what to do and when to stop.Bring your energy back to the arms.  See if it begins to gain force.  Once the arm movements gain momentum, you’ve managed to release what blocks were hampering the flow.  If you haven’t, you just have to keep repeating the process of finding all of the blocks you are led to and to focus on them.  If nothing works, be prepared to just let things be and either just let your partner get what he or she can gain from lying there in the music’s embrace, given that the moment, your pure intention and what self-healing capacity could work on the body during the duration of the session have done their part. You can also opt to massage them instead. I honestly don’t believe I can put the true inner massage training in a book or a webpage.  This is something you have to find yourself or find someone who can teach you. I have met but a few who can really do this well, and even those few cannot do it constantly. I have my “off” days myself. Do come and visit me if you want to really learn this.  There are just too many levels to it and I’ve managed to give only one advanced workshop on the meeting point of inner dance and massage since I began to teach inner dance a year and a half ago.Now if the arms are flowing freely, the next energy holes are somewhere at the back of the shoulders.  Since your partner is lying down, wait for the moments when their arms reach upwards, (it happens most of the time) to give you access to any part of the back that you can lightly touch. Slowly place pressure, taking care not to push them to move in any certain way.  Don’t forget, no matter when points you’re pressing, you must always be conscious that the points are dynamic. If you do not move with them, you’re performing acupressure or reflexology. Maintain your focus on this area for a few minutes, paying attention to the arm movements and whether they really have found it.  You will know it if they have, if the force of the movements are gathering momentum no matter how bad their illness. It is my own general rule of thumb that, save for exceptional cases such as paralysis or coma, the more profound the illness, the more receptive people should be to the flow of dancing energy.Once the momentum has taken over, raise the music tempo up a notch.  If there is an air-conditioning unit or fan that is turned on at all, turn it off now and partially open any windows that might allow fresh ventilation to flow into the room (does not apply to highly polluted areas).Just wait.  Distancing might help, as well as freeing any loosening that may have turned up within your own body from the resonance you received from the session so far.A time will also come when you will intuitively feel that your partner should sit up.  You can work on the chakras more effectively from this position.  If your partner did not yet spontaneously sit up, place yourself near the head, while kneeling.  Put some pressure on the crown (don’t push upwards but simply nudge gently) and see if your partner will indeed automatically sit up on his or her own.  If this doesn’t happen, try the same slight pressure behind the shoulders.  Did the person sit up?  If no, just let your partner be.  If yes …If Your Partner is Sitting Down. This process is slightly different in regards to the ascension of energy through the spine as compared to when your partner is lying down.  The work is more active for both you and your partner.Your entire focus is to direct the concentration of energy from the base of the spine to the crown.  You might already be familiar with kundalini, chakra, shakti or sekhem energy, which refers to the feminine energy that should be cycling from the base of the spine to the crown and back, but is usually atrophied at the base of the spine due to dense blockages located on the higher chakra points.From the sitting down position, it is always good to start with activating the crown and loosening the blockages on the neck to help your partner find enough looseness to intuit the inner dance at the regions of the throat and thyroid chakra system.After around five to ten minutes, depending on your partner’s receptivity, see if there were any spontaneous changes in your partner’s posture.  Did it straighten on its own?  If it did, see if the energy gains enough momentum that it activates the arms on its own.  If not, you will have to infuse your own active resonance along the spinal column starting with the heart and thymus chakra points, later moving to the solar plexus, the sex, and the root chakras (concentrate on this last chakra point if and when the person spontaneously bends down).Has the person gained momentum?  If no, try letting your energized fingers be led to certain dynamic points around the areas near the shoulder blades.  You will know if it is either blocked or needs an infusion of resonant energy.  If you don’t feel anything, it is both you and your partner that is blocked.  If you feel a slight energy rush, then a loosening and infusion of resonant energy is taking place.  Keep at it, applying some pressure if you intuitively feel the need to do so.Move your attention to the arms, specifically the energy gaps at the wrist and the funny bone.  Nudge the wrist to see if it will fly off with your slight guidance.  If it remains in the air after you remove your finger, leave it alone and see if it will find the dance on its own.  If it falls again, repeat the process a few times.  If it keeps falling, you have to go back to the shoulder area, maybe even the forearms, the biceps, the triceps and the shoulder blades, and lastly the spine.  There are no rules or any specific order on how to loosen the blockages on the arms, and any other part of a person’s body.  Massage helps but so does inner dancing around the area, just focusing on the energy field.  The healer and the partner’s over-all energies have a great effect on the outcome of the session, but so does the room, the music, and many other factors.  These suggestions are meant to help you start out until you later sense that you have different healing opportunities presented in every person and every moment that is given to you. Don’t let this daunt you.  This is your chance to discover your own techniques that will help you best in finding new ways to heal people through the inner dance.From this point, the energy should take you and your partner to whatever is best for both.  There’s no point in defining what you should do when this or that happens.  Otherwise, this specific healing process begins to take the form of a discipline, rather than an open-ended avenue on the way towards our free, forever and infinite selves.  Try to refrain from falling into habitual patterns.  Energy resides in formlessness.  It retreats on the threat of falling into repetition.  Energy abhors clichés. It gets bored as easily as you do.  It gets excited only when you yourself are excited; it starts bouncing around when you find your ability to see newness in all sorts of experiences, whether pleasant or daunting, often even in situations that are especially problematic.Continued, Alchemy . . . 

Catharsis

Listen carefully.  There are no other salient points on the healing brought about by Inner Dance than this.  I’ve been bombarded with questions, views and dismissive arguments on how catharsis should be handled, and how this has scared off many would be initiates.Let’s tackle this slowly, piecemeal.Catharsis is naught else but rapid change in the body, or explicitly, a releasing of a person’s trapped energies at breakneck speed.How does it happen?People will only enter into catharsis if their lower mind gives way to the higher mind in a comfortable setting, trusting that the moment, the space, and the people involved allows for the release of trapped energies.Why does it happen?Humans are always looking for a way to release trapped energies.  In a natural state, people are supposed to allow it to happen. But automatic life rarely allows for the natural release of blockages to take place.Why are people so afraid of it?Catharsis is triggered by the internal agreement of our lower mind to relinquish control to our incomprehensible higher mind.  People undergoing catharsis come from an inward feeling of bliss, while maintaining an outward perspective may sometimes spark off some fear that accompanies this loss of control.  The same applies to people in the vicinity of those undergoing catharsis.  Fear-based questions pop into their heads:“what if the person doesn’t return to normal?”;“what if this person is possessed by some evil spirit…?Etc.These questions stem from our human tendency to try to understand everything.  It is a tendency rooted in fear.The mind is much bigger than we think, and the soul is infinitely larger.People have a normal tendency to create fear-based patterns that limit their infinitely larger natural thoughts, words and actions.  Scattered tension solidifies all over the body.  The more this happens, psyche follows suit.  Fear-based patterns are maintained and reinforced over time for the sake of the illusion of security.When we let go of our mental defenses in favor of the larger part of us, in a very rapid manner, that’s when catharsis happens.So, what do you do?The first answer comes from the opposite direction.  What don’t you do?Don’t be afraid.If you are, don’t send your fear.Don’t allow your partner to see as if anything is wrong.Just the act of trying to normalize your partner will send vibrations that this catharsis is not supposed to happen. Which in turn, adds fear to a situation, a fear that has a multiplier effect in the realm of energy.Do you have enough perspective to realize that this amazing release of trapped emotions has tremendous healing capacities? Perspective is the only way to control fear.  If you see things from the larger viewpoint, there is nothing to fear. If you do not see things as what they really are, there are plenty of things to be afraid of.  In energy work, what you see from your own value judgments sometimes happens right away.Seeing has nothing to do with having knowledge about every little detail.  Seeing has everything to do with trust; trusting that when we allow everything to happen in faith and without fearful human intervention, a higher and natural balance will unfold.In this realm, there is just one thing to accept, create and experience.  There is only oneness.Catharsis takes on many forms. Crying. From experience, this is the most common form of catharsis.  Often enough, workshop participants who cry later relate that there was no particular emotion or life experience that arose from the release.  That the act of crying “just happened” with no reason whatsoever.  Universally speaking, everyone who underwent this phenomenon says that they feel a burden lifted off their chest, an incredible sense of lightness all over their body and a freer mental state as before they underwent the cathartic experience. Intense movement.  Often accompanied by rapid breathing and profuse sweating, people often sway wildly, roll around the floor, or bang their hands on the ground.  The movements always differ, often directly relating to a person’s occupation, background, etc.  People punch the air, do ballet dance, write their names on the ground, or run around in circles.  The movements almost always transition from forceful movements to gentle ones. Screaming.  This form of release happens when people resist the act of letting go, yet simultaneously build up energy inside.  Likened to a volcano or an unopened soft drink can that gets shaken up, pressure builds as people gather energy by doing the movements.  Unless these people create exit points through their pores, their lungs, by crying, or learn to find a mental flow, they sometimes have little recourse but to scream.  After they have done so, they feel spent, exhausted but with a slight tingling across the body.  It will take just a few minutes to replenish their emptied out bodies with fresh energy, but it is advisable to take a short (or why not a long?) nap afterwards.  If a person in this state turns on the mental facility right away, there is a possibility that he or she might fill in the cleansed space within with the same old patterns which that person tried so hard to release in the first place.  The recovery process should be done without rushing, as organically harmonic as possible.  Laughing.  This isn’t that common but it nonetheless happens.  I noticed that it strikes melancholic personalities more often than jolly-good fellows.  For some strange reason, this scares beginning facilitators more than the crying and screaming manifestations.  It seems to be regarded by some as reminiscent of a typical scene in a mental institution whereas weeping catharsis somehow feels more natural in a healing scenario. Speaking in strange tongues, if not gibberish.  This too is particularly scary for some facilitators. The word ”possession” often surfaces; it is in these instances that healers find themselves questioning their own capabilities to handle such situations. Those I’ve observed manifesting this are people who usually have trouble communicating and have bottled up some things they were meant to express in an earlier time. Notice that when this happens, they end up repeating the same phonemes rather than speak in complex articulations the way languages to be.  Many sound like over-grown infants who have yet to learn a single language.  Know that they are simply cleansing their throat chakras, which will later have a great balancing effect with their solar plexus and heart chakras. Regression.  One of the most interesting forms of catharsis is a return to innocence.  This is when a person invariably retreats into a fetal position for a time, temporarily losing the ability to function as an adult while they spend a few minutes going back to the experience of being back in the womb of the mother.  Some become like children while others withdraw into a silent space.  Extreme cases claim to even regress to a past life in the past such as Rome or to a forest tribe in very specific situations involving other people.  Many of these experiences lead to profound insights on identity and avenues to heal the self in the present life.To give you an idea of how powerful a healing facility catharsis has, there’s a story about a woman named Angie.  She attended a workshop I gave in a healing community of the Good Shepherd Sisters in Tagaytay.  I touched her head for a minute or two and left her to begin work on the others.  It was a couple of minutes before I noticed that she was exhibiting all of the many cathartic forms listed above.  She was screaming, crying, speaking in tongues, balling into a fetal position, laughing some of the time, alternating with intense movements.  A small woman, three people couldn’t hold her down.  The first wave of fear the group sent was strong.  A lot of them believed that Angie was possessed.  After the thought was articulated, the group was made to convert the fearful energy into love.  It took a while for Angie to recover.  Her fingers were pressed to her eyes almost the whole time.  I didn’t know that she had acute Glaucoma and that her vision had been quite impaired for many years.  I later learned that she gained her full eyesight right after.  She stopped her medication after that and relied on the dance whenever her eyes would get even slightly blurry. Another woman who attended the workshop went through a lot of catharsis during those sessions in Tagaytay.  After she left her glasses in the center, she eventually realized that her eyesight normalized to the point that she didn’t need her glasses anymore.If I was to suggest one basic foundation stone of catharsis work, this is it.  What energy you bring forth shall manifest.  The same applies to your partner.If you believe that your partner is possessed by an outer force, that reality will manifest.  If you believe that all of creation is reflected within the inner, that instead, will manifest.I’ve facilitated group sessions where people go “out of their mind,” losing total control.  The collective energy in the room can often affect the outcome.  If you are facilitating a large group, instead of focusing on the person undergoing the catharsis, focus first on the people in the room.  Be internally calm first; then calm people in the room taking advantage of this opportunity to demonstrate to them the beauty of the process of this heightened state of release.Messages such as “everything happens for a reason;” “if people didn’t let go of the pain, it will ever be there,” and “the deepest healing crisis is not always pleasurable,” aren’t just soothing for your energy partner, they are important lessons for all those in the room (including you).There are also moments when you need not do anything.  But just to be there, smiling, attentive, and assuring that what is happening is part of the natural course on the road to complete wellness.  Just wait.  How much do you trust the human body, the human mind, and the divine soul?  If left alone, how much healing can take place?  Is there always a need for human intervention?  When the person’s  inner energy takes over, is it a superior healing agent to your fear-based intercession?Just wait.  And instead of processing the person, process yourself.  Every bit of your own inner energy is reflected in every molecule within the room. If everyone can just come from this one single thought, they will have no problems considering that we can all heal ourselves and we can all help others heal themselves. Continued, Special Ailments . . .  

Dancer Can Heal

12/12/2007.
What if you were to learn just how easy it is to awaken to the world as energy? Would it also grant you the capacity to heal your own (and another’s) energetic, mental and physical vitality if you truthfully approached the promise with clarity of mind and a stout heart?
I am granting that many of those reading this are familiar enough with the Inner Dance to know that it is often an inter-personal process; that it becomes particularly effective when done with an open and receptive energy partner. Take careful note that there are no “healers” and “patients” in this healing dimension. In the world of energy, all things are one. Those words are semantics. Energy partners shouldn’t get attached to words that connote superiority. Partners aren’t healers nor patients, but rather your co-journeyers as you deepen towards the cavernous Hearts of the Earth, God, and Man (or Woman?). In context, keep playful in your role-play, that these semantics do not stick to either your ego or insecurities. In practice, treat them with respect knowing that energy gives back instantly what you give it. If you treat the practice, the space, the moment, and especially your energy partner as your equal on this sacred moment, you will receive the same.
This said, do you have it in you to heal yourself as you heal others? Answer this with clarity of purpose. If you were to help another human being in freeing his or her own blocks, look at yourself and ask whether your intention is pure. Can you send this person more love than you would, fear?
Yes? Yes? Then, yes.
Inner Space. Prepare a large enough space. Your goal is to create an environment where you and your energy partner can trustfully facilitate a process of purging blockages and gathering energy. Incense, candles, soft lighting, soft pillows – even music – are mere placebos meant only to foster belief that a healing process is really taking place, for both your mutual selves. But until you are already experiencing sacredness at all spaces at all times, for now, do all it takes to create the proper conditions; it is only in setting the right conditions that you do not have to relinquish control over the strange process of liberating ourselves from bondage. As to the rest … well, that’s a different story. Over and above these, the best placebo is belief. Keep your eyes open, especially the one at the center of your forehead. If life seems two, bring a third middle into the scene until two has become one.
Take note that the deeper purgation process isn’t always suited for the public eye. You’re looking for spaces where people can scream, laugh out loud; where people won’t bump into sharp objects even with their eyes closed; where you don’t have to worry as to the volume of the music without disturbing neighbors. You also want to avoid direct sunlight for first sessions. Until you’ve learned to focus your own energy into a solid benevolent ball that cannot be affected by external disturbances, keep indoors. You might want to leave alone the times of the day when the sun is especially harsh. Refrain from chilly rooms. If not clay, wooden floors are best.
First bless your session. Now is a moment where you shall honor our highest selves. Here is where you shall create your tiny personal portal to our infinite, free and eternal Self. And if you truly believed this, you will treat the space as your temple and ensure that the world’s noises will not penetrate it. And when it does, that all things are one and you are at peace at all times. Better yet, you shall leave this space knowing that the whole universe is just one big church and God is both all of what is creative and what is created.
Inner Sound. You’re looking to activate the MU Wave patterns in both your brain state and your energy partner’s. Prepare an IPOD, MP3 player, or Audio CD playlist at least an hour-and-a-half long. Start it with a couple of songs that trigger delta waves before even going to theta. If you have a laptop or PC in your space, there are various programs you can download on the internet that can be simultaneously played with your MP3 or CD music. I’ve been using a handy program called Atmosphere Lite that plays nature sounds along with the four major brain wave simulations (Delta, Theta, Alpha, Beta). The MU Wave frequency is a combination of these four waves; it triggers the involuntary motor reflex as well as the trance-like state you and your partner should be in to break the thick mental patterns which are your first blocks to accessing inner energy.
Are you ready? Let’s begin.
Inner Light. First, place your thumb at the crown. What you’re trying to do is send light to your partner’s brain. At the very center of the top of that person’s skull is an energy hole, or a perceivable gap where resonant light can easily pass from a person who gives freely, into the brain of another who receives willingly – especially if the other is in the act of purging attachments to a past need in favor of a higher truth.
If the person is even somewhat receptive, light that scatters through the brain can quickly scatter to the whole body through the most subtle of our physical systems, the nervous cycle. The nervous system which comprises the brain, the spinal cord, and the nerves is the primary energetic pathway for raising that person’s vibration. It ought to take you no longer than two minutes after you place your finger on the crown to be able to tell whether your partner has enough openness within this system in order to receive light or if there is too much density for light to pass through closely-packed mental (and consequently, chakra) blockages.
If the conditions are set and you are doing this right, your energy partner should feel a strange piercing right through the brain’s core. Your partner will later attest to two sensations. One, he or she will feel a strong electrical charge from the base of the spine all the way upwards through the bulk of the brain. Two, your partner will also feel that the head is being anchored strongly in place by a force that seems to both emanate from within and outside the skull.
Don’t talk during the session; there will be plenty of time to ask questions later.
For now, you can validate how receptive your partner is to the activation of energy flow through two parts of your own body: Your head or around the general area where your heart might be.
First. In your head, check what kind of thoughts entered into you as soon as you began the process. From your authentic point of view, are your thoughts negative or not? Are they sponsored by love or fear? If you feel a negative energy take over you which was not as pronounced before you were in the other person’s proximity, you are likely resonating that person’s energy blockages.

Don’t worry. You aren’t absorbing that person’s negative energy. Even if you tried to do so, you cannot do this, it is not possible. All that is happening is you have activated your potential to resonate with what you perceive as that person’s negative energy. By doing so, you have both activated and spread out an energetic resonance much like that of the partner you have agreed to open yourself to. Your simple goal is to convert the like “negative” energy that was activated through the resonant contact, into something positive.
There is no easier conversion process than to focus on one simple resonant idea. Love. Activate this thought form by believing in it. Charge it with emotion and an innocent willingness to give freely without expectation. There are so many books that teach that one must cleanse the self using outer rituals after healing sessions; rituals are but your own placebos. Keep only resonance in mind. Keep the conversion process within the realm of inner consciousness and even the densest partners cannot affect you, but rather the other way around.
Resonance.
Now, validate how effective the conversion process has been, at your heart level.
Feel.

What do you feel? How do you feel? Focus your attention on differentiating the last two queries.
Do you feel good now? Do you still feel negative?
You may (or may not) feel a curious vibration in your chest. Somewhat like an electric current, or a kind of heat that simultaneously flows inwards and outwards, from your chest to your shoulders and throughout your arms, your hands, your fingers; maybe even throughout your spine and your head.
Whatever the case, while one hand is anchored at the crown, place the other hand’s energized finger at the nape of the neck located directly at the right side of the muscles surrounding the spine. There’s a hollow right below the base of the skull. Do you detect any movement, whether slight or sudden?
As an aside, I mentioned above the words finger and energy. In the case of Inner Dance, one of the best techniques you can learn is how to make the fingers dance. It’s a lot different to how pranic or Rei Ki healers energize their palms and their fingers. Instead of that usual pressing your palm points or shaking your hands physically, really energizing your hands is a much longer and complicated process if you are to have any real healing effect on people. The process involves the centering of your attention to your heart chakras while undergoing an unexplainable ego death I still can’t put to words.
Part of it has to do with freely offering yourself as a channel or a clear instrument for the Divine Mother’s gifts of healing.
Let’s go back to your fingers. Your goal is to activate them along with your palm that they can become powerful extensions of light. Try this. Bring your attention to your fingers. Look at them, but don’t stare. Just look. Or if you can manage it, don’t look, but see. Just see them. If you have felt the inner dance energy flowing through your body before, concentrate that energy within the area of your hand. If and when it starts to find the inner movements, ask it politely (that’s right, talk to your fingers) to show you the best way of combining the nodes of the tip of your thumb with small joints of your fingers. If you have problems with this, you’re just going to have to keep at it or wait until you see me again. As soon as I can afford to get a digital video camera, I’ll make you an instructional video just on this which I will try to place on the internet for free.
Have you found it? I hope you did. If yes, then if you haven’t found the neck movements yet, place both hands’ energized fingers at the temples. You might feel a rush of electricity flowing from (and through) your hands, mostly near the wrist area and your fingers.
Don’t regard this as a universal indicator, but you will know that you are doing this best if your fingers begin to dance a certain spiraling motion that doesn’t ease its pressure right after you pressed them at the temple area.
Again, bring your attention and your right hand’s energized fingers at the right-hand side of the person’s neck near the spine. Don’t forget to keep your left hand at the energy gap on the person’s crown. If you now detect the person’s inner dance, maintain the slightest touch, making sure that you are not forcing any movement by pushing or pulling, but that the movements are authentically your partner’s.
If the head begins to move, the person has begun the alchemy of transforming the darkness within into light. Know also that he or she has done so probably because you too have converted some of your own mental blockages from density (heavy emotions) into free-flowing energy (light harmonic head-space).
IamMayan Disclaimer
Note – Some beginning and advanced practitioners of the inner dance often find that level where they do not need to be instructed through any mental constructs such as what is described above. The best healing happens when you are able: 1.) to resonate with all types of healing environments yet still be able to maintain your higher vibrations; 2.) to find your inner movement and allow it to determine the exact motions the mutual healing requires; 3.) to know which of the movements that have manifested are yours and which are your partner’s.
Nonetheless, though you cannot help but discover just how varied people’s movements can manifest, there are some universal patterns that arise, transcending race, age and personal background. I’ve seen a Korean Child dance the exact same movements as an old man from Mindanao at different times, just as a married couple in the same session may dance as if they come from different planets.
You will also find yourself in high-powered sessions when you instantly know that you do not have to touch any part of a person’s body to facilitate his or her inner dance. Maybe it’s the room, the person or you but for whatever reason, be free to throw away all of the rules when you sense that you are in that special moment when all outer has collapsed into the inner. There is nothing that now separates you, the person in front of you, and everything in between Earth and the Boomerang Nebula.
Thus, this document seeks only to guide us through what is universal in practice (from my perspective, creation and experience only) as a basic starting point until the time our collective understanding of this phenomenon has evolved to the point when this document is as precious as 1-ply toilet paper. You do not need to practice for too long to find out that there are infinite ways to approach healing others via the Inner Dance. Some are surprisingly basic and other methods, downright explosive, but who is to say what is effective and what is not. Make the flow your general intent, first have no expectations save for being in a state of love and trust.
Inner Air. You will know when your partner has found the inner dance. You will know this by intuition, and if you don’t, there are easy telltale signs.
First, notice a change in breath. You aren’t looking for any specific form. Both shortness or slowness are characteristic of a gathering of energy. What you’re looking for is depth, and you can see this by listening. You are waiting for the Inner Breath; when people begin to suddenly breathe unconsciously, but from their inner depths. It is different from trained and instructed breathing such as pranayama. Inner breathing isn’t a mental exercise. It is founded on a deep centering and natural gathering of energy from within and without.
You will learn to discern this through emphatic practice. It is not a technique. It is something you will just know. Particularly when you yourself have found your own Inner Air.
Inner Breathing is escorted by Inner Seeing, indicated by REM.
When does this sudden jump from the outer to the inner take place? Does it happen instantly?
I’ve learned one technique I’ve come to depend upon. Once your partner has found the movement, no matter how slight, distance yourself and wait. Wait to see if he or she can find the true core energy without contact. A loose, open and receptive person can find it just with a few movements of the neck. Try not to hurry the process. Just wait. It is something you will know, only when you yourself find it often enough.
Did your partner’s spine straighten after around two minutes? No? Ever so lightly, bring an energized finger to where the heart chakra might be. Don’t be technical about the exact “where,” the energy holes aren’t static. They can be quite dynamic, moving up, down and sideways. It sometimes helps to connect with the person’s crown chakra before touching the heart chakra.
If your partner didn’t instantly straighten his or her spine, then take it for granted that the cylindrical spinal pathway of energy is clogged. What to do now?
Work on the neck chakra some more. Unlocking this energy center can allow outer light from above to enter and trapped inner light from below to ascend more freely. Again, don’t push or pull to get your partner to move the head. Your goal is not to make them dance. You are both here to rediscover the flow and to put it into place, where energy isn’t flowing. The dance is not an end unto itself; merely the avenue by which you and your partner may find your way back to the highest energy flow you can achieve during the session.
If you are able to energize the neck chakra eventually, you will notice that the spine becomes more lithe and sensitive to touch as if it is lightly electrocuted every time your finger makes contact. Partners of advanced healers attest that they feel an enjoyable electrical sensation they describe as a probing extension of energy that penetrates their skin and muscles.
Wait.
Once the spinal blockages are slowly loosened which you can confirm once the back begins to move, you will also feel pockets of energy holes all over both sides of the back. Pay even closer attention to the shoulders and both sides of the shoulder blades. If you unblock the shoulders first, you will have an easier time unblocking the entire arm later.
At this point, you will have received what energy you have given to your partner since you began the session. Use this to discern if you are to maintain contact with the body or to begin concentrating on the person’s energy field without touching the person. If you don’t know this yet, you are thinking too much. Stop it. Change your mood. You’re too serious and you aren’t in the moment. How can you help others find their inner when you’re approaching the now from the outer?
If you really are dissonant, re-check yourself. How? Look at the person in front of you intently. Love that person. Smile inwards and wish for him or her as much love as you believe you deserve. Just come from that emotion. Even if you don’t feel it, just know that all thought, properly intended Become and already Are.
Close Your Eyes. Just Wait.
Ok then. How’s that spine? Your partner’s and yours. Are they both clear? If no, keep to the spine and the neck, often bringing light to the temples and the crown. Keep at it until the back is moving with ease. Only then can you move on to the arms. There are two major energy centers I always depend on. I begin with the energy hole on the wrist where the pulse is usually strong. The other point is the funny bone, that spot on your elbow which gets electrocuted every time you hit it against anything. Take a few seconds for the light from your hands to enter the energy gaps. Remember to touch these two points as lightly as you can.
Oftentimes, beginners literally carry their partner’s arms to help them find the dance. Nothing could be more distracting for your partner from their inner movement than this. Don’t carry.
First energize, waiting patiently, then very lightly, nudge the first movement. That is the moment you will know whether their arms will take off, to their surprise, without their conscious volition. The moment when their arms find the inner dance, that is, when people have difficulty denying that it is not their minds which are moving them but are moving by an inexplicable source they cannot remember they have ever felt (usually).
If people aren’t in awe of this energy, are not in awe of a newness, then they are moving normally. With their minds. I have trouble with people who’ve attended previous intuitive movement workshops when their teachers command them to automatically sway this way and dance that way without waiting for the gathered inner to take them over. They sometimes attend my workshops for the first time and automatically do what they usually do. They have not yet switched off the 3 to 5% of their functioning brain and have yet to allow their complete 100% self to transition them from the outer dance to the inner dance.
Again. Is your partner in awe, as are you? Awe dwells in a state of newness, as inner is always infinite. No matter how often or how deeply you’ve gone, you must always be in awe of the inner; you must always be aware that you are headed for infinity. Again. Are you in awe? If not, re-check yourself and make sure you are facing the direction of your inner. If not, don’t force yourself. This lone pre-requisite isn’t something you put on like a mask. It is something you Are. You cannot find your Inner if you believe too strongly in its opposite. You can find many discotheques for that sort of dancing.
Going back, helping your partner find the inner dance of the arms is usually trouble-free. Don’t mind it if the movements start out slow and slight. As long as they are genuine, those tiny gestures are already gathering more energy as they are helping to remove blockages not just in the arms but in the entire body as well.
At this point, place your fleeting attention to your partner’s climate control. If there are Goosebumps in the arms, blockages or so-called negative energy are not yet exiting as much as energy is being gathered. The pores are one of the best exit points for releasing physical and energy blocks. This is an even bigger challenge for you to heighten the vibratory frequency of the person’s surrounding energy field. Your goal is to help your partner gather enough momentum to break open the tiny exit points found within a person’s epidermal layers. Once a person has broken out in sweat while in the trance the Inner Dance elicits, a feeling of bliss takes over the body. It is a sign that you have helped cleanse and energize your partner so much that they are being enervated at the cellular level. A curious vibrating feeling in you and your partner from head to toe will confirm this.
If your sound system is flexible, this is the time you can transition slow meditative tracks to upbeat ones. Later, I’ll list down my own favorite playlists to give you an idea of what I’ve been using in workshops as opposed to one-on-one healing sessions.
Is the Inner Dance picking up? If yes, distance yourself from your partner. Elevate your own level of energy by centering and focusing on which movements feel appropriate for gathering energy and releasing blockages. Experiment with extreme angular wrist, elbow, shoulder movements to try to find clicking noises. Those who practice the Inner Dance long enough find that their entire body begins to make high-pitched clicking or crackling sounds much like the noises high-voltage electricity make. People usually take for granted that these sounds are bones cracking until some might notice that the crackling takes place even in areas far away from joints, such as the skull or even the biceps, affirmation that the crackling is due more to blockages or “negative” energy being released in newly-discovered exit points.
From here, pretty much anything can happen. Ideally, you should be in the zone your partner is in. Meaning, you should be in a free-flowing head space, harmonic with the room and free of doubts. Once you feel that your partner is flowing freely and will surely find the energy on his own, you have two options. You can leave your partner and shift the focus to yourself or you can choose to stay beside the person.
Remember, the dimension of energy begins and ends with the core. If you are able to help a person find his or her own energy, you are helping that person gain energetic independence. There are few greater gifts than remembering our innate ability to heal and energize ourselves. If your ego latches on to the grandiose thought – “hey, look at me, I can heal you,” – you are missing the point. You likely have issues with power; you are likely concerned with the outer, not the inner dimensions of the human experience.
If that’s the case, then you might encounter problems along the way. Without being overly cautious, just be watchful and rest on the assurance that the universe adjusts our mental hiccups courtesy of the School of Hard Knocks.
That aside, here are but a few reasons why you shouldn’t yet go off into your own corner and try to gain from the energy exchange you are facilitating. One, if your partner is entering into a state of catharsis. Two, if your partner has a particular illness or bodily condition that needs careful work.
Continued, Catharsis …

The Maian Eye.

12/16/2007.

At first, I read that it was the ancient name of Mindanao, where I now reside.

Until someone told me … MA-I … was the ancient name of the Philippines.

But, everyone on Earth was once … Maian.

Will again become. Maian.

I AM MAIAN. You are.

Until everyone started talking to me about the Mayans. Until my sister sent me a book. It said that a Mexican named Juan said the ancient Mayans knew the dance. The Inner Dance.

Until the time I learned that the lost Mayans believed that the end of time is FIVE years from now. Until I was also told that Maya is the world of Illusion.

Mindanao is the fifth largest island in the world. Palawan is the fifth largest in the Philippines. When I was living in an island in Palawan, the spirit christened me a name. Juan Lima. Lima is five in P.I., or the Philippine Islands. The Mayans think that we are five years away this december from the end of of the fifth cycle.
When I walked around Mindanao, the spirit christened me a name. Pi. Pi is 3.14. A man came up to me once. He had a tattoo on his back. He didn’t know why he had it placed there two weeks before. He spoke to me on the basis that there must be some kind of connection with his tattoo and my name. His tattoo had the numbers 3:14 in it. Exodus 3:14 to be exact. So we looked at the Bible to even be more exact.
Exodus 3:14 said “I AM who I AM.”
I AM through the looking glass is MA-I.
Ayam through the looking glass is Maya.
Until I learned from a history book that the Philippine Islands or P.I. are the remnants of a lost continent. A lost continent called Mu.
Until I learned that Pi and Mu are letters of the Greek Alphabet.
Until I found an ancient symbol they found in ancient Greece.
And Egypt, China, Europe and other very old places. It is called the Flower of Life.
Until I found out that Pi is the 16th letter of the Greek Alphabet.
And Mu is the 12th.
Until I noticed that the numerology of the 16th and the 12th was in the Flower of Life.
And the letter Pi stands for P. Or Palawan.
And the letter Mu stands for M. Or Mindanao.
Until I read a very old book by a Rosicrucian named Cerve.
That a sacred mountain in Mu was called Mt. Mu-Pi
and it was ruled by a Queen Kalifah.
Until I made the connection that the Mother spirit that had been appearing to me in dreams and vision was also called Kali.
Or the Great Mother in India.
Until I arrived in a magical beach in Palawan called Kalipay. Until I looked at the boat that took me to Kalipay.
And on the boat were the words, Kalipay Mu. Or in Visayan, Your Happiness.
Or Kali – Pi – Mu.
Until Kali asked me to construct the Flower of Life on the Ground.
Using very large rocks. And was made to concentrate on balancing fire and water.
Until I realized that when I was walking around Mindanao, I saw fire all around.
Until I lived in Palawan and found out that the ancient name of Palawan is Paragua. Or “for water.”
Until I later learned that for the Japanese, Mu means balance.
Until I saw two interlocking triangles in the abandoned house in Kalipay.
And for the Greeks, one triangle meant fire or the male.
And the upside-down triangle meant water or the female.
Until I started planting seeds in the Flower of Life.
A symbol that had the two triangles inside it.
And realized that if Pi is 16, which in numerology and kabala is 7, which appears a lot in my life, like my birthdate (7/7/76), that it may have a connection to the seven days of the week. The seven colors of the rainbow. The seven notes in the scale. The seven chakras. And the Seven Days of Creation.
And realized that if Mu is 12, that it may have a connection to the twelve months of the year. The twelve signs of the zodiac. The twelve strands of the DNA. And a few other 12’s.
And so I made a planting calendar. That had sounds and colors in it. And it was called The Flower of Life. And for a few months, I only ate what grew on the Flower of Life. And on the 12th month of the year, something happened. Something happened to me. After I ate off of the FLOW-er of Life. When it happened …
… I heard a voice. It said. The Mother and I are now One.
My body started dancing. The Cosmic Energy moved me. To the Inner Life. Of the Dancer Within.
___________
Until I left the island after I turned 30.
And started touching people. And the people started to dance. And the people started to ask.
What is this dance? Not everyone remembered.
Until some started remembering. Something that was big.
It was a question. To the answer Who Am I?
The dance was a question to the Ma-I within.
Which was in turn the answer. To Why Am I Here?
And when some remembered, some began to change.
And knew some of the Who and some of the Why.
And brought the dance to others. Who started to remember.
Close your eyes.
Q: Why Am I Here?
A: Who Am I?
Q: The Inner Dance.
Wait.
I lived in the U.S. before. Until I woke up one morning. A voice told me that I had a meeting.
Until I went outside. And had a meeting. A Mexican I’d never met. He said we were to walk to the mountain.
The San Gabriel Mountain.
When we got to the mountain, he told me Who I Was and Who I Am. And Who I Will Be. And he was right. He told me about my past, and he knew how I was as a child, as an adult, and told me how I would be as an old man. If I lived long enough.
And he spoke to me as if I would hear him years later. And years later, I heard him. As if he was speaking to me years before.
And he showed me the words:
In the last days, the highest mountain shall be declared as the highest over the hills.
And all nations shall stream towards it. And that people shall be rebuked in their ways.
And from Zion, instructions shall come. And that nations shall get their swords and their spears and turn them into pruning hooks and plowshares and everyone will learn to walk into the Light of the Lord.
And he told me that the world has forgotten a secret. That You Are Me. And I Am You.
I Am You. I M U. I Am Mu.
And that Mu was not just in the past. Mu is in the future.
And the Mexican told me that people would not believe me. At first. Because I am too young. Much too young. And that I would fail in the end of the beginning. But that someone would be with me. Someone very old. That the world forgot. When the world said that God was only a man, and not a woman. That She would be with Me. With every step that I took.
And he told me that Man took over the world. And thought that he could Lord over it. Not knowing that everything in it is his equal. Every single atom. And how he treated every atom, is how he himself will be treated. When the time comes. And that time is near.
And I went down the mountain. And did not see the Mexican again.
Until years later. I saw him again. And I’m not going to tell you about that. Not until you begin to understand. That we are all much older than you think. So don’t think. That the earth is 6,000 years old. Just as a religion or two used to teach a few hundred years ago. The Earth is billions of years old. The Earth is one planet. There are trillions of galaxies that contain billions of stars each. And I don’t even want to tell you about the planets. Or much less, the entire universe. And the universes before and after this one. Because no one on Earth knows. Re-members.

And when you do (re-membering is inevitable) start remembering. Really Remembering. You won’t be interested anymore. On who is the Mexican, and I, and other trivial matters. The only thing that truly matters is that the universe is moving. Out there and in here.
And you will suddenly realize that the question called The Inner Dance. Is part of the Great Re-Membering. Of the Beginning. Of the End. And. The End. Of the Beginning. Of the Cosmic Dance.
Of Life.
Close your eyes. And Wait.
How many times have we been through all this? Forgetting. And not remembering. And suffering. In need. And in separation. From God. And everything that is part of God. Which is Everything. Even what seems to be not God.
Close your eyes. Why Are You Here?
Who Are You? You Are.
The Inner Dance.
Wait.
Are you Ready? Ready for what?
You are becoming. Who You Are.
You are Here To Be. Who You Truly Are. Not you. YOU.
Close your eyes. Open your third.
Your Maian Eye.
The Maian Eye can see what your Mayan eyes cannot see.
Your Maian Eye is your Maian “I.”
Close your Mayan eyes, Open your Maian “I.”
And Wait.